I was the judge and jury

James 4:12 (NIV) 12 There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you—who are you to judge your neighbor?

We all do it.  We are all judge, jury.  I am guilty.  I get so tired of this.  I think I got this judging beat and then it raises its ugly head again.  I received a phone call the other day telling me about some decisions that someone else had made concerning me.  I really upset me!  What happened after that was worse.  In my mind I decided why this person did what they did.  I know this person very well.  It does not matter how well though …. I do not know there heart,   only the Lord knows that.  The phone call was Thursday afternoon, by Thursday night I was so upset it affected my wife and my sleep.  I went to bed angry which is a no no.  I woke up worse.  So mad I could not pray, did not want to pray.  Doesn’t this person get it????  Don’t they understand????  Don’t they understand the decisions they are making are not right????  Oh yeah …. The decisions are affecting me.  All this time ……… this person had no idea the free fall I was in ….. How mad I was.   I assigned a motive to this person’s actions without ever talking to him.  JUDGMENT.    I am tired …..  Tired of this person that tries to live in me.  Friday I wrote a letter to three men that I respect very much.  Hoping for some sort of solution.  All day Friday I waited for a response…..nothing from them but plenty from the Lord.  Go figure…… by the end of the day I knew what needed to be done.  When does a deceived person know he is deceived?  I kept hearing that over and over.  I had been duped.  The cesspool (my depravity) I was walking in smelled very bad.   It was time to do what was right.  It was time to do Matthew 5:23 “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, (Or I have something against them) Kevin Added.   24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.  I had men’s group Saturday morning.   At one point we talked about this very thing.  In my mind I hear …. It is so easy to tell others about judgment yet that is exactly what you have been doing.  Practice what you preach.  I left there broken but relieved.  I called this person and we talked for 30 minutes.  Everything thing I had assumed was totally wrong and I was set free.  There was a reason for every decision that he made.  Guess what?   None of it had anything to do with me.

The truth is......... I caused every bit of the pain I was in.  I could see what was happening but for some reason I could not stop it.  The kicker is this ….. Because of what I did I chose to suffer.  Once that process began then the enemy came in and started to twist things even more.

This was not an attack in the beginning but it sure turned into a full fledged assault in the middle of it all.

Thank you Jesus for being in my corner.

Be Blessed Kevin