This is from what I wrote on Dec.  11^th 2011

If you don’t change ……… then nothing changes.       I have written about this before, so I am writing again about it. I am 50 lbs. over weight.  I have chosen not to do anything about it!   My eating habits are horrible and I have no discipline in these areas of my life.  I am not complaining, because that will not accomplish anything, it is really about the first line in this paragraph.     I just need to get off my butt!  I guess it is just not bad enough yet.            If I don’t change………. Then nothing changes.                 That goes for every area of my life.    Scripture says your body is a temple,   1 Corinthians 6:19 Do you not know that your body is the temple (the very sanctuary) of the Holy Spirit Who lives within you, Whom you have received [as a Gift] from God? You are not your own,   20  You were bought with a price [purchased with preciousness and paid for, made His own]. So then, honor God and bring glory to Him in your body. ^[1] This is my Goliath!  Sometimes I feel this is how my life is supposed to be.  Well that is a lie strait from the enemy and I refuse to believe that.  If I don’t do something then in a couple of months I will weigh more..

 I am here to tell you that I did not change.  I continued to stuff my face, gorge whatever you want to call it.  I continued to put on the weight 11 more pounds.  ON February 12^th 2012 I stepped on the scales and weighed 268lbs.  That is the most I have every weighed in my entire life!  Something inside of me just snapped.  I am here to tell you that today I stepped on the scales and I weigh 217.8 lbs.  Thank you Jesus!

What I have learned is I started to get this hopeless attitude about my weight and I have found that I can have this attitude about other areas of my life where I struggle.  So once again it is all about choice.  I became overweight because I like to eat and I would eat even when I was not hungry or continue to eat when I was full.  That was my choice and the devil didn’t make me do it.

I changed …. Then I changed1   How did I do it?  I stopped eating fast food completely and I stopped drinking Dr Pepper.  I take my lunch everyday.  Even when I am home  I lay out what I am going to eat and stick to it.  I stopped eating bread and I drink over 100 ounces of water everyday.  so be encouraged that you to  can lose the weight if you need to.  It is not a special diet. 

It Is Choice!!!

Be blessed today!

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Colossians 3:12-17
So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.NASB95

I read this and I see Humility … actually I see lots of things for me.  As I reflect on everything that the Lord has put out this week on unforgiveness, bitterness walking in offense.  I find the biggest thing I struggle with is taking on an offense for someone who has been hurt by someone else.  One of my friends had something happen at her job last week.  I am thinking,  how dare he treat her that way?  I find myself right now,   when I hear his name I get angry because of what he did to my friend.  I saw a comment on my wife's face book by this person last night and found myself having utter disdain for him.  I find myself not ever giving to his ministry again!  

Really?????? 

Do you ever have one of the moments where you just sit there and know that the Lord has just got your attention.  I hear "You have been writting all week and it took until this morning for you to hear me?"   Right now it just hit me and I am broken because of my judgment and anger towards this man.  A man who has absolute ministered to me over the years.  Yep a man who is flawed just like me.  Who died and made me JUDGE?

Okay I just got my cage rattle this morning….. diidn’t see that one coming.  I have to say that sometimes I feel the Lord is sneaky, but it is always good.

Lord I repent for the anger, bitterness, unforgivneness and for being the judge. Please forgive me.

I pray favor over M… for his ministry and for his family in Jesus name

PS My friends wife is still in a coma please pray for her

I was reading through some old blogs that I wrote a few years back.  It seems this week is about unforgiveness, bitterness and being offended and today is about old wounds.  I am having to ask myself is there someone I am needing to forgive or that I have picked up an offense somewhere?  At this moment I am hearing nothing, but that can all change at the drop of a hat.

Old wounds

I have been signing my emails lately with the phrase “there is no future in the past” Little did I know that would be more for me than I realize.  I always hate when something gets brought up and you realize that even though you forgave that person, the wound is still there.  I thought I dealt with it … as a mater a fact I did and I got peace as well at the time.   It has come back.  I got a word from the Lord Friday night as I was driving down to Fredericksburg.  A friend of mine is always sending scripture.  I don’t mean just one scripture but 10 to 20.  Sometimes a whole chapter.  Anyway what he sent me Friday night was this. 

8     He who gets wisdom loves his own soul;

he who cherishes understanding prospers.

9     A false witness will not go unpunished,

and he who pours out lies will perish.

10   It is not fitting for a fool to live in luxury—

how much worse for a slave to rule over princes!

11   A man’s wisdom gives him patience;

it is to his glory to overlook an offense.

Verse 11 is what just hammered me.    I just looked at it and said “Lord, are you freaking kidding me?”

I have to tell you part of me on the inside said,  do you remember what he did to me and how he talked to me and how he made me feel like a freaking idiot … dumb ass  or whatever.  Then I have to remember what my book the Bait of Satan says.  (Too much to write)   Anyway my wife says,   have you forgiven him and while I was answering I hear Holy Spirit say NO!   So I said No I guess not,    dammit!  So this is a good thing but I don’t like it.  The fact that I have to forgive this person over again is very irritating.  Nevertheless it has to be done.  Here is where the rub is I am supposed to love him, but I don’t want to.  I know this man is very wounded and has been for a long time.  I feel I have forgiven this person …..AGAIN!!!  I had to forgive my x wife over and over as well as her husband for the first couple of years after the divorce for stealing her from me.  So I know I can do this …. It will just be a process.  

Present day:  Here is what I know, I believe in my heart that I have truly forgiven this person because I can't remember for the life of me who it was I am talking about in the above discussion.  That is  not to say that something might come up and remind me later of who this is and the enemy may tell me that "see you have not forgiven this person"  Then I take that thought captive to the obedience of Christ and know that I have forgiven that person.  I would say this,   if you say "I think I have forgiven this person,"  then I would say that you have not.  You know in heart if you have forgiven him.  You hear this saying in church all of the time.  The wound is healed but there is a scar and the scar still hearts if you rub it.  I think that is crap!  You are either healed or not!  the blood of Jesus is not selective it covers everything!  I say that if the scar still hurts then YOU keep picking at it.  In other words you have a victim mentality.

Peter asked Jesus,  " 21Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” 

22Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.  In an 18 hour day that you are awake that is forgiving someone every 14.03 minutes.  I heard someone say once.  I dont pray for an hour everyday but I don't let an hour go by without praying.  something to think about.

Be Blessed today

Kevin

 

The Trap,

Ever been trapping?  Anyone who has ever been trapping knows that it takes one of two things to be successful. It must be hidden in the hopes that the animal will stumble upon it, and it must be baited to lure the animal into the traps deadly jaws.  This is what satan does and he is more deceptive and cunning than any human on this earth.  It is his job to trap you that is his only focus in my opinion.

Offense is one of the most insidious, nastiest, most deceptive kinds of bait there is and we have all encountered it at one time or another in our lives.  Offended people choose to live this way and they produce much fruit.  It is just not the edible kind.  Many signs of being offended are, hurt, anger, jealousy resentment, strife, bitterness, hatred (which is murder) and envy.  I would say if you have any of these symptoms then most likely you are walking in offense.  Most people who are offended do not even realize they are trapped.  They are so focused on the wrong that was done to them.  They are in denial.  The most effective way for the enemy to blind us is to cause us to focus on our selves.  What do we called it when we focus on ourselves?  Would that be PRIDE?  Holy Spirit says in James 3.16 for where there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind.

Jesus said in Luke 17.1 it is impossible that no offenses shall come, but woe to him through who they do come.

Psalm 55:12 If an enemy were insulting me, I could endure it; if a foe were raising himself against me, I could hide from him. 13 But it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close friend,14 with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship as we walked with the throng at the house of God.    It is those who you care about that hurt you the most.

2 Timothy 2: 24 And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.25 Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, 26 and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will. 

I have questions …. How does your fruit taste?  If I went to your spouse and asked if you are hurt and offended or walking in unforgiveness, what would they say?

Are you living with a victim mentality?  Do you defend your position on the matter?

Are you prideful?  Pride will keep you from admitting your true condition.  Out of the mouth the heart speaks.

Parts of what I wrote today came out of chpt one of the Bait of Satan.  Choose to be free today!

You hurt?

2 Timothy 2:23 again I say, don’t get involved in foolish, ignorant arguments that only start fights. 24 A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone, be able to teach, and be patient with difficult people. 25 Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth. 26 Then they will come to their senses and escape from the devil’s trap. For they have been held captive by him to do whatever he wants. This is what I read yesterday and I thought about it all day and when I woke up this morning I was still there. I had to read it again. What I kept hearing was “unforgiveness” I thought …… Who? It is not who but how. How do you be kind to someone who has hurt you or your family, how do you teach? How to you be patient? How do you gently instruct someone who has hurt you? Someone who has deeply wounded you? I don’t believe you can do any of that when you are walking in unforgiveness. People that hurt us are usually more wounded than we are. Hurt people hurt people that is a fact. Forgiving someone is a very powerful thing. Forgiving someone does not mean that what they did was okay. It means that you have stopped giving them the power over you. It means “Lord when (name) stands before you on judgment day, please forgive them for what they did to me or my family and Lord I pray blessings over them in Jesus name.

When we walk in unforgiveness we are holding a judgment over them. WE WANT JUSTICE! The Lord said revenge is mine says the Lord. You realize that when you hold that judgment against that person you will never be free. There is only one judge and you are not it. There is always going to be pain in your life, but you choose to suffer, IT IS YOUR CHOICE!

Only God has the right to judge. He alone knows why people do what they do. We do not know, nor is our place to judge why. In many cases, people do not even know why they do what they do, Jeremiah 17.9 The heart is deceitful above all thing and is desperately sick; who can know it? When people assume to know why, then their reactions are based on judgment, and not reality. That judgment causes confusion, pain and suffering (quote for How to stop the pain)

Three questions

Are you judging the people that hurt you?

Are you walking in unforgiveness?

How is that working for you?  How is that noose around your neck?  You are the only one that is tightening it!

Remember if nothing changes then nothing changes

Be Blessed today

Kevin

Surrender 2 Corinthians 1.9

2 Corinthians 1 9…………………………we stopped relying on ourselves and learned to rely only on God, who raises the dead. ¹⁰ And he did rescue us from mortal danger, and he will rescue us again. We have placed our confidence in him, and he will continue to rescue us. ¹¹ And you are helping us by praying for us. Then many people will give thanks because God has graciously answered so many prayers for our safety.

I am reading this morning in 2 Corinthians….. I must have read over this three times and I just kept coming back to this passage.  I realized I am just running on my own juice.  I try to turn everything over … at least I think I do, it is wearing me out.  My wife asked me yesterday “how do we get more balance in our lives? You work all the time; I work all the time..  What do we do?”  I had no answers.  It made me sad on the inside.    I went to church yesterday.  The message did nothing for me.  In fact I did not even want to be there.  I could not shut my mind down and I hate that.  That is how it is all of the time right now.  I cannot shut my mind down long enough to hear God.  I did hear Him yesterday though.  I heard him through Marcus Brecheen.  Marcus said   “I surrender the things that I should be responsible  for and take responsibility for the things I should surrender.” 

That line right there really resonated in my spirit

From a previous post:       Jeremiah 38:17 Then Jeremiah said to Zedekiah, “Thus says the Lord, the God of hosts, the God of Israel: ‘If you surely surrender  to the king of Babylon’s princes, (or whatever is going on in your life right now)then your soul shall live; this city shall not be burned with fire, and you and your house shall live.   Here is what I know for me.  My life is so much calmer when I surrender.

Surrender is always a tough one for me, what is the worst thing that could happen if you surrender? Here is what François Fenelon the Archbishop of Cambria said in the 17th century.  He was the spiritual advisor to Louie the 14th.  He said this in a letter to the King about surrender.  There is more in the letter but this is the main point.  Let me tell you what real surrender is.  It is simply resting in the love of the Lord, as a little baby rests in his mother arms.  A perfect surrender must even be willing to quit surrendering, if that is what the Lord wants.  We renounce ourselves, and yet, God never lets us know when it is complete.  If we knew, it would no longer BE complete, for there is nothing that bolsters the ego quiet so much as knowing that it is fully surrendered.  Surrender consist, not in doing great, heroic deeds about which self can brag, but simply in accepting whatever God sends, and not seeking to change it.  Surrender is the source of true peace.                                                                                                                   I have noticed for myself that when I have completely surrendered.  (At least when I think I have)  I feel at peace.  When I think I have surrendered something but I am restless about it and I don’t have peace,   then I am still holding on to it.  I don’t like that. 

The more you look at what you are not; the less you become who you are!

So here is my question or questions for you.  Ask Holy Spirit right now.  Stop what you are doing and get quiet.  Lord, please show me what I am trying to control or change instead of surrendering and giving it to you.  Lord what am I trying to change in their life that is not my job to change?

Be blessed today.

Acedia

So,  I am reading in this book ……. A book that is taking me over two months to read.  (Only because I am reading two to three pages a night.)  “Are you a fan or follower” very good book.  Sunday night I am reading and come across a statement that a man prayed one time.  It said, “God, I thank you that tonight I haven’t seen anything I want more than you.”  Can I say that I am not there today ….. Have not been there in a while.  That is okay, because I am getting back to that point.  The word says if you will draw near to Him He will draw near to you.  That is a promise.  Do you believe that?

I find it very “God” timing that what I read Sunday night has everything to do with what I wrote Sunday morning.  What a jolt!  We have all heard of the seven deadly sins.  This list was comprised by the early church leaders.  There is not an actual list in the bible.  One of the sins that I want to touch on is sloth.  We all think of sloth as being lazy, but I found something very interesting, something I did not know.  The term sloth was taken from the Greek word Acedia  “ἀκηδία” which means “describes a state of listlessness or torpor, of not caring or not being concerned with one's position or condition in the world. It can lead to a state of being unable to perform one's duties in life. Its spiritual overtones make it related to but distinct from depression”

A better way to describe it would be spiritual apathy.  This is where you get to the point where you know God loves you and that he sent His son to die on the cross for you but yet you just shrug your shoulders.

The Passion has gone 

Jeremiah 2:2 “Go and proclaim in the hearing of Jerusalem:

“This is what the Lord says:

“‘I remember the devotion of your youth,
how as a bride you loved me
and followed me through the wilderness,
through a land not sown.

Then It came an absolute word from the Lord to me.  It said “Your Honeymoon with the Lord should never be over”  It cut me like a knife.

So what do you do?  What do I do?  Revelation 2:4-5 ⁴ “But I have this complaint against you. You don’t love me or each other as you did at first!^{[a] 5} Look how far you have fallen! Turn back to me and do the works you did at first. If you don’t repent, I will come and remove your lampstand from its place among the churches.

Enough said!

Kevin

Matthew 7:20   Yes, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit, so you can identify people by their actions.

My heart has not been in a great place for some time.  I have been very busy (Buried Under Satan’s Yoke) It has been all I can do to spend time in the word because I have too,   not because I want to.  So what happens is my attitude changes and my fruit becomes sour and my dog returns back to her old behavior and is afraid again.  Every day this week when I would come home she would be on her bed terrified.  I wouldn’t say a word to her.  I would then get her to go outside, while outside I would check her bed and there would be a big a pee stain just like the old days.  I really hate admitting this but I have a problem and I don’t like it.   My way is not working,  I didn’t think I was doing it my way, but every time I get like this it is because I am jealous, angry, self-centered to name a few which means I am doing it my way.  I will leave you with a question for yourself and Oswald Chambers’s devo that also rattled my cage this morning. 

How is your fruit tasting today?

Verily I say unto thee, Thou shalt by no means come out thence, till thou have paid the uttermost farthing. Matthew 5:26.

“There is no heaven with a little of hell in it.” God is determined to make you pure and holy and right; he will not allow you to escape for one moment from the scrutiny of the Holy Spirit. He urged you to come to judgment right away when He convicted you, but you did not; the inevitable process began to work and now you are in prison, and you will only get out when you have paid the uttermost farthing. ‘Is this a God of mercy, and of love?’ you say. Seen from God’s side, it is a glorious ministry of love. God is going to bring you out pure and spotless and undefiled; but He wants you to recognize the disposition you were showing—the disposition of your right to yourself. The moment you are willing that God should alter your disposition, His re-creating forces will begin to work. The moment you realize God’s purpose, which is to get you rightly related to Himself and then to your fellow men, He will tax the last limit of the universe to help you take the right road. Decide it now—‘Yes, Lord, I will write that letter to-night’; ‘I will be reconciled to that man now.’

These messages of Jesus Christ are for the will and the conscience, not for the head. If you dispute the Sermon on the Mount with your head, you will blunt the appeal to your heart.

‘I wonder why I don’t go on with God!’ Are you paying your debts from God’s standpoint? Do now what you will have to do some day. Every moral call has an ‘ought’ behind it.

---

Matthew 26:35 Peter said to Him, “Even if I have to die with You, I will not deny You.” All the disciples said the same thing too.

As I am reading this morning,  I came to this scripture.  I just sat there and stared at it.  For the first time in a long time I had to ask myself “How many times do I deny Jesus in one day?”  Peter did it three times.  I remember watching the Passion of the Christ and thinking about how Peter denies Jesus in the movie.  I remember thinking “how can he do that to Jesus?”  Then I thought “I do it all the time!”  with my tongue,  my eyes, my actions.  It made me very sad when I really thought about it.

Don’t worry, I don’t have a stick in my hand ….. I’m not beating myself up.  It is just an eye opener

Be Blessed today!

Prepare your field

Luke 11:8-10
I say to you, though he will not rise and give to him because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will rise and give him as many as he needs.
"So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.
For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.NKJV

So I am reading this morning and I am thinking about the one thing I always pray for when I pray. I always pray for favor in everything, people, places and his work in his business. There is a little story in Facing the Giants. It came to mind this morning as I was reading. It is so true. When I think of how many doors He has opened for me in the last year, Doors that in no way could have been opened by anyone including myself. Doors that were opened in spite of myself and my actions …. Astounds me.

Prepare for Rain

The story happens when Mr. Bridges walks in to Coach Taylor's office and gives him a word out of Revelation 3:7-8.  "………………………..  This is the message from the one who is holy and true,  the one who has the key of David.  What he opens, no one can close;  and what he closes, no one can open:⁸ "I know all the things you do, and I have opened a door for you that no one can close. You have little strength, yet you obeyed my word and did not deny me. After he leaves the Coach's office, Grant gets up and goes out into the hallway and stops Mr. Bridges and He asked him if he believed that God gave that to him.  Mr. Bridges said, "Yes I do"

Then He tells the story about the two farmers who desperately needed rain, both of them prayed for rain, but only one of them went out and prepared his field to receive it.  Which one do you think trusted God to send the rain?  Coach Taylor said, "the one who prepared his field for it".  Mr. Bridges then said, "Which one are you?  God will send the rain when he is ready; you need to prepare your field to receive it.

 

Here are the questions: Are you preparing your Field?

 

Are you still praying for that door to be opened?

 

Have you giving up? I say keep knocking!!!!!

Don’t slack off

Matthew 6:33
Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.NLT

The devo below is from the other morning. It has really stuck with me over the last few days. Then this morning the above scripture really stuck with me. I am going through one of those periods where I have struggled in my prayer life and being in the word. It is like a daily grind to do just do what I need to do ….. I don't like that. It seems like there are areas in my life that I am living righteously where I didn't before and areas where I did and now I don't. I know some of you can relate to what I am saying. The word says draw near to me And I will draw near to you.

Have a blessed day!

Don't slack off

Whatever ye shall ask in My name, that will I do. John 14:13.

Am I fulfilling this ministry of the interior? There is no snare, or any danger of infatuation or pride in intercession, it is a hidden ministry that brings forth fruit whereby the Father is glorified. Am I allowing my spiritual life to be frittered away, or am I bringing it all to one center—the Atonement of my Lord? Is Jesus Christ more and more dominating every interest in my life? If the one central point, the great exerting influence in my life, is the Atonement of the Lord, then every phase of My life will bear fruit for Him.

I must take time to realize what is the central point of power. Do I give one minute out of sixty to concentrate upon it? "If ye abide in Me"—continue to act and think and work from that center—"ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you." Am I abiding? Am I taking time to abide? What is the greatest factor of power in my life? Is it work, service, sacrifice for others, or trying to work for God? The thing that ought to exert the greatest power in my life is the Atonement of the Lord. It is not the thing we spend the most time on that molds us most; the greatest element is the thing that exerts most power. We must determine to be limited and concentrate our affinities.

"Whatsoever ye shall ask in My name, that will I do." The disciple who abides in Jesus is the will of God, and his apparently free choices are God's fore-ordained decrees. Mysterious? Logically contradictory and absurd? Yes, but a glorious truth to a saint.

 

Trust

John 14.1 Don't let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me. NLT

John chapters 14-17 are so rich and full. They are my favorites. John 14.1 always comes at the right time. I have to remind myself that when my heart is troubled, I do not trust the Lord with that particular circumstance. When my heart is troubled, the majority of the time I want to control the situation and not give it to the Lord. I am afraid that if I let God make the choice it will not be the choice I would make. What do we call it when we think we can do a better job than the Lord?

It is my opinion that if you are miserable right now about something then you are not giving it to the Lord and trusting Him. Is this not what this life is about when you are a follower of Jesus? Trusting? You are not going to ask if you do not trust. If you trust then you will have Joy.

So the questions today are, do you trust Jesus in the situation that you are in? Or do you want to be in control? If you want to be in control,

How is that working for you so far?

John 16:23-24
"And in that day you will ask Me nothing. Most assuredly, I say to you, whatever you ask the Father in My name He will give you. Until now you have asked nothing in My name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.NKJV

Psalm 138

Psalm 138
A psalm of David. I give you thanks, O Lord, with all my heart; I will sing your praises before the gods. I bow before your holy Temple as I worship. I praise your name for your unfailing love and faithfulness; for your promises are backed by all the honor of your name. As soon as I pray, you answer me; you encourage me by giving me strength. Every king in all the earth will thank you, Lord, for all of them will hear your words. Yes, they will sing about the Lord's ways, for the glory of the Lord is very great. Though the Lord is great, he cares for the humble, but he keeps his distance from the proud. Though I am surrounded by troubles, you will protect me from the anger of my enemies. You reach out your hand, and the power of your right hand saves me. The Lord will work out his plans for my life— for your faithful love, O Lord, endures forever. Don't abandon me, for you made me.NLT

This was very encouraging for me this morning. I have been very busy as of late and my quite time is suffered. I really don't like that. I woke up this morning and I laid there and thought "YES" Lord whatever you want. While I was prayer walking in my driveway I heard Psalm 137 so when I came in I read it and didn't get anything from it so I read Psalm 138 and got peace from it. One of the lines really struck a chord with me. He keeps His distance from the proud. Do you ever wonder why you are not hearing Him? Does the Lord feel distant? Just a few questions to ask yourself.

I have a prayer request, please pray that I would have more balance in my life when it comes to work, family and my time with the Lord. Thanks

 

Be Blessed

Just pray and get out of the way

Just doing a little reading this morning when I came to this devo. It reminded me how easy it is to want to fix someone and get in the way of the Lord. I had a couple that I was working with a few years back. Actually I was just working with the Husband. He would call and we would meet and we would talk. Many times he would ask me what he should do. I would tell him what I felt the Lord was showing me or I would give him advice from my life experiences in marriage. I began do get very frustrated with this person because he would not do anything I would say or suggest. In fact if he would have been paying me, I would have fired him because he was just wasting his money. One day, and this day was March 31^st 2008 I read the devo below. Two things happened, I stopped helping and started praying. The second thing I realized was this …. This person did not have a teachable spirit. You cannot teach someone if they are not willing to listen. This devo below really messed me up. It showed me to get out of the Lord's way.

 

Sometimes ….. all we are supposed to do is pray …..THAT IS IT……. Just pray.

 

March 31st

Heedfulness v. hypocrisy in ourselves

If any man sees his brother sin a sin which is not unto death, he shall ask, and He shall give him life for them that sin not unto death. 1 John 5:16.

If we are not heedful of the way the Spirit of God works in us, we shall become spiritual hypocrites. We see where other folks are failing, and we turn our discernment into the gibe of criticism instead of into intercession on their behalf. The revelation is made to us not through the acuteness of our minds, but by the direct penetration of the Spirit of God, and if we are not heedful of the source of the revelation, we shall become criticizing centres and forget that God says—". . . he shall ask, and he shall give him life for them that sin not unto death." Take care lest you play the hypocrite by spending all your time trying to get others right before you worship God yourself.

One of the subtlest burdens God ever puts on us as saints is this burden of discernment concerning other souls. He reveals things in order that we may take the burden of these souls before Him and form the mind of Christ about them, and as we intercede on His line, God says He will give us "life for them that sin not unto death." It is not that we bring God into touch with our minds, but that we rouse ourselves until God is able to convey His mind to us about the one for whom we intercede.

Is Jesus Christ seeing of the travail of His soul in us? He cannot unless we are so identified with Himself that we are roused up to get His view about the people for whom we pray. May we learn to intercede so whole-heartedly that Jesus Christ will be abundantly satisfied with us as intercessors.

 

Blinded by the darkness

1 John 2:9-11
Anyone who claims to live in God's light and hates a brother or sister is still in the dark. It's the person who loves brother and sister who dwells in God's light and doesn't block the light from others. But whoever hates is still in the dark, stumbles around in the dark, doesn't know which end is up, blinded by the darkness.The Message

I was actually looking for something else this morning when I came to this. It made me think about the people who are actually walking in unforgiveness and they don't think they are. There unforgiveness is effecting everyone around them. Their spouse, there kids and their friends. The interesting thing is this. The passage above speaks about stumbling in the dark, blinded by the darkness …. Don't know which end is up! The sad thing is so often we feel we are right and don't realize that the enemy disguises himself in the light and so we believe the lie spoken to us. Then everyone around us suffers. What is even worse is when we spread our poison to our spouse and get them to believe in the same thing which in a way is murmuring.

Corinthians 11:14
and no wonder! For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light.NKJV

Galatians 5:7
You ran well. Who hindered you from obeying the truth? NKJV

So here is the question today.

Are you walking in unforgiveness today and trying to get your spouse or friends or even your children to side with you so you can justify your actions? Are you feeding them your poison?

Psalm 128

 
This morning as I was prayer walking I heard this passage of scripture Psalm 128. Which took me back to what I wrote two years ago sometimes I feel right now that I am in the same place I was two years ago. It fluctuates
Psalm 128
How joyful are those who fear the Lord— all who follow his ways! You will enjoy the fruit of your labor. How joyful and prosperous you will be! Your wife will be like a fruitful grapevine, flourishing within your home. Your children will be like vigorous young olive trees as they sit around your table. That is the Lord's blessing for those who fear him.! NLT

January 2010
Once again the Lord amazes me. This morning he directs me to the book The Fear of the Lord by John Bevere to page 79 (I have not read the book yet) and to Galatians 2:20. The biggest thing I got out of the story is this. Do I give everything to the Lord or do I hold back and Lie. Do I make myself look good to man (Which is fear of man)? This all goes back to how you conduct yourself when no one is around. Do you walk with integrity and honesty? Is your Fear of the Lord lacking in this area? I know for myself I lack in this area in places. These places are in my heart. After I read several pages of this chpt it made me realize once again that my Fear of the Lord is not where it should be. I mean …. If someone stood beside me and I knew they were lying to the Holy Spirit and then they were struck dead right before my eyes, would that be enough for me to change my ways? I don't think so…….. Maybe for a while. As I have seen for myself what the Lord has done in my life and in others. Why am I not in Awe? This is a place that I am seeking.
Acts 5:1-11
but a certain man named Ananias, with Sapphira his wife, sold a possession. And he kept back part of the proceeds, his wife also being aware of it, and brought a certain part and laid it at the apostles' feet. But Peter said, "Ananias, why has Satan filled your heart to lie to the Holy Spirit and keep back part of the price of the land for yourself? While it remained, was it not your own? And after it was sold, was it not in your own control? Why have you conceived this thing in your heart? You have not lied to men but to God." Then Ananias, hearing these words, fell down and breathed his last. So great fear came upon all those who heard these things. And the young men arose and wrapped him up, carried him out, and buried him. Now it was about three hours later when his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. And Peter answered her, "Tell me whether you sold the land for so much?" She said, "Yes, for so much." Then Peter said to her, "How is it that you have agreed together to test the Spirit of the Lord? Look, the feet of those who have buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out." Then immediately she fell down at his feet and breathed her last. And the young men came in and found her dead, and carrying her out, buried her by her husband. So great fear came upon all the church and upon all who heard these things. NKJV
As I am reading in Galatians, I does not even dawn on me that Galatians 2:20 which I have memorized fluently is in this chapter until I get to it. When I get there it leaps of the page at me. It becomes Rhema. Once again the Lord shows up, but why is that not enough for me to be in Awe? He kept my mind blank until I got to 2:20. Many times I read a chapter the first thing that goes through my mind is "Oh yeah I remember that" Here is what I know, I am a son and I have been crucified. I like what the Message version says.

Galatians 2:20
I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.NKJV
Galatians 2:20-21
I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not "mine," but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that. Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God's grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily. The Message

 

Matthew 18.32-35

Matthew 18:32-35
Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, 'You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me.
Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?'
And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him.
"So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses."NKJV Had lunch with a gentleman today and we had a good talk.

It was Iron sharpening Iron today. The biggest thing that I took was the hurt I could see in him. The hurt comes from going to someone and confessing sin knowing that you have been told this is a safe place. Only to have stones thrown at you after you confess. The man I met with today is not harboring un-forgiveness, but he is hurt because he confessed and asked for forgiveness but the forgiveness was not given. So who is the one being tormented here? Not the man I met with today. No wonder people do not like to confess to other people. They're afraid they will get hurt. It is a real shame to do what the word says only to get slapped in the face.

I have a question. Has someone come to you and confessed something and then you turned it around and threw it back at them? Or did you receive the confession like Jesus with skin on? Did you pray over that person for there healing?

Lord, I am walking with you

When I am in pain.

I sit down to explain

Lord You are my light,

That is when you burn so bright.

 

I know you hear me.

Answer me when you are ready.

When You talk to me,

The answer is meant to be.

 

Our Lord will find a way

To protect me everyday.

He gives me the tools that I need.

It is all in the bible, just read.

 

The answers are there,

In the bible everywhere.

Apply the laws of the word.

Nothing will go unheard.

 

I see you work through my friends.

They always have the right things to say.

My friends support me through out the day.

They say, keep seeking and looking too him and pray.

 

Lord, I am walking with you.

Bless me in all the things that I do.

Lord, You are the best.

You give me peace and allow me to rest.

 

My life now has a purpose.

There is more than just believing.

Live God's way,

Begin to pray.

 

Your Holiness took me by surprise.

My faithfulness to You will constantly rise.

Your glory has me hypnotized.

You love me for who I am that I realize.

 

By kevin gwyn ÓCopyrighted 03/29/2002

Un-belief

Out of the mouth the Heart speaks. Ever heard that little saying? I heard a great message yesterday about the words that come out of our mouths. The scripture below was touched on.

Hebrews 3:12-13
Be careful then, dear brothers and sisters. Make sure that your own hearts are not evil and unbelieving, turning you away from the living God. You must warn each other every day, while it is still "today," so that none of you will be deceived by sin and hardened against God. NLT

This is just a small part of what he touched on yesterday but it was so dead on. Unbelief

If unbelief is in your heart then you will speak negative and negativity is the language of the enemy.

I don't know about you but speaking the language of the enemy did not sit with me very well. I know that there is power in your words. I try to be very careful in speaking. I don't want to speak anything over myself or over anyone else. That is why I believe I never get sick, because I say "I don't get sick all the time"

Have you heard the saying….."Crap rolls downhill" When you are with someone who is negative have you every noticed that you will allow yourself to get sucked in and before you know it you are being negative as well. Do you have that friend that every time you call for help they are always negative and when you get off the phone you are actually worse than before you made the call? Negative people will suck the life right out of you. You must be careful.

If you complain all the time and gripe and speak negative then what do you expect your life to be like?

How is that attitude working for you?

Lord, Help me with my un-belief today, Help me to speak with love and to not be negative, but to bless everyone I come into contact with.

 

 

Hosea 6.1-3

Encounter Marriage Weekend (this is a link to the website) ………… That is where my Bride and I went this weekend. From 6:00 Friday evening until 12:00 AM Sunday Morning. It was good and there were awesome teachings. There were very good moments that I will never forget for the rest of my life. There were some moments that were painful or you could say wounding. There are many times that we may get a word from the Lord and it wounds us because it is truth. Hosea 6:1-3 "Come; let us return to the Lord. He has torn us to pieces; now he will heal us. He has injured us; now he will bandage our wounds. In just a short time he will restore us, so that we may live in his presence. Oh, that we might know the Lord! Let us press on to know him. He will respond to us as surely as the arrival of dawn or the coming of rains in early spring."NLT James says that if we draw near to Him He will draw near to us. So Saturday, Kelly and I drew near to Him as a couple and He revealed Himself to us and it was good. What we realized as we set in that broken down trolley was the trolley represented our marriage. We had not been seeking the Lord as a couple but as individuals. That will not work in a marriage. The trolley represented what a marriage will be become if you do not work together as a couple. It will be become broken and become a trolley sitting in a junk yard rusting away. Many times you have to get to a broken place before you can get fixed. I sat in that trolley with my bride for 3.5 hours without getting up. It was one of our longest and for me the most in depth conversation we have had in 9.5 years. Thank you Jesus. The other main point that the Lord showed us is this; since we both serve in the Ministry of Fellowship of the Sword for the last six years ……. We poured all of our spare time into the ministry and nothing into our marriage and our marriage has suffered. James 1:26-27 If anyone thinks himself to be religious (piously observant of the external duties of his faith) and does not bridle his tongue but deludes his own heart, this person's religious service is worthless (futile, barren). This is the person who ministers outside of his home but does not minister to his family. External religious worship [religion as it is expressed in outward acts] that is pure and unblemished in the sight of God the Father is this: to visit and help and care for the orphans and widows in their affliction and need, and to keep oneself unspotted and uncontaminated from the world. AMP This is what happens when you don't. You make your spouse and children widows and orphans in your own home.

So in the same breath these two scriptures are about Honor. Honor your spouse and your children first and then what you do outside of your home will be honorable.

Thank you Jesus for bringing us to a place of brokenness so we can be restored.

 

 

All of the tools

2 Peter 1:3
By his divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life. We have received all of this by coming to know him, the one who called us to himself by means of his marvelous glory and excellence.NLT

The Lord showed me about six months ago why I continue to want to look at porn. I don't look but sometimes I want too really bad. I asked the Lord one morning, "why do I struggle so much in my mind in this area?" He said, "I have giving you all the tools to walk in freedom, you choose not to use them!"

That was an eye opener and I got more freedom from that. I had realized once again that I was still trying to do it on my own. There are many times I feel like I have turned it over, but I have not. I did not realize that what the Holy Spirit spoke to me that day was actually scripture until today.

Are you using everything that the Lord has giving you? Or are you still trying to do it yourself?

How is that working for you?

Who Is This Man?

Who is this man?

He is called the Messiah.

He came to deliver us.

The Son of Man, He is Jesus.

 

They say You are the King of The Jews.

We know You are the King of all.

That day You felt so small.

But we knew You stood tall.

 

Your time has come, it is okay to cry.

You knew You were going to die.

You knew You were going to be betrayed.

You were in the garden and You prayed.

 

You knew what You had to do.

Which was to die for everyone.

No one wanted to help.

Nothing but scars and whelps.

 

He healed so many at his expense.

He was accused and had no evidence

The truth is all He had for his defense.

Still, He had to suffer the consequence.

 

They hit You.

And called You names.

Your tears fell like the rain.

How could your people be so insane.

 

So much dissension.

The crowd had every intention.

The people needed to repent.

But Jesus, did not resent.

 

They flogged You.

They spit on You.

What could you do?

They knew Your soul was true.

 

The thorns pierced Your skin.

In addition, you knew you could not win.

You did this for me.

To the cross, You carried my sin.

 

They drove the spikes through Your wrists

You were in so much pain.

Yet, You did not resist.

This was your destiny.

 

They slashed You with a whip.

Broke open Your back.

All they did to You was attack.

As Your blood did nothing but drip.

 

His blood washes away our sin.

His blood did not go to waste.

His tears dripped from his chin

Jesus searched his soul deep with in.

 

Jesus, they could not keep You down.

God took away Your frown.

You rose in three days.

Jesus, thank You for giving Your life away

 

By kevin gwyn Ó Copyrighted

04-10-2002

Counting the costs

Luke 14:26-28
"If you want to be my disciple, you must hate everyone else by comparison—your father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even your own life. Otherwise, you cannot be my disciple.
And if you do not carry your own cross and follow me, you cannot be my disciple.
"But don't begin until you count the cost. For who would begin construction of a building without first calculating the cost to see if there is enough money to finish it? NLT

I have been very troubled this morning by this passage, so I know something is stirring in me. The book "not a fan" is really raising some questions in my heart. I am thinking if I lived in a country ….. Say the Ukraine …….. Like someone I know. Would I be a fan or a follower? I know what this person went through because off his faith in Jesus. I know that this person's family turned their back on him when he chose Jesus. I know this person IS A FOLLOWER. He counted the costs and he chose wisely. This person is someone I deeply respect. I know this person and if he was faced with denouncing Jesus or die he would die.

I have to wonder about myself though. I have to wonder if I was made to go live in China or Iran If I would still be a follower or a secret fan. I mean I wouldn't want to be beheaded because I was a follower of Jesus. This has really stirred me up this morning and is really giving me a lot to think about.

Am I a fan or a follower?

Have I really counted the costs?

I think I put more effort in my estimates when it comes to counting the costs.